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It is time to hang up my g-string, FMPs and thigh highs...
I went away for the month of January, down south for some sun, and did a great deal of soul searching. The end result was that I got a great suntan and I made the decision to retire at the end of this month (February 2012).
The biz has been so much of my life since I entered it in 2004, that leaving it fills me with a combination of trepidation and excitement.
- Change is scary. Waking up daily and not immediately checking my emails for appointment requests, completing prescreening and rushing to get ready for a last minute caller will all be new territory. Reading and participating in provider and local industry related discussion boards will be a thing of the past, as the best way to move on is to let go.
- Change is exciting. Imagining a new life and creating a new future has endless possibilities. Answering emails only when I feel like checking them, sitting around comfortably in blue jeans and not having to have my hair and makeup perfect all the time and not being available 7 days a week will take some getting used to, but I welcome the change.
I have been fortunate. The Chicago community is, in my opinion, the best place to be. The hobbyists and ladies, for the most part, have a tight knit bond. Everyone came together when a lovely lady, Cheryl, lost her life some years ago. When HighandTight, a beloved hobbyist passed on, people were touched and moved to help out his family through an anonymous donation collected at a Meet-N-Greet. When members of the community experienced loss, hardship or illness, the community came together to offer words of encouragement and support.
I posted my retirement on one board and was overwhelmed by the outpouring of support and well wishes and love. I have beeen fortunate to make many friends among the hobbyists I have met. Gents who, over the years, have shared their stories, their accomplishments, their hardships and their time with me. My closest female friends are all in the industry. Ladies I have laughed with, cried with, empathized with, got tipsy with and have grown to love. Many of which, I hope, I will remain my friends for many years to come.
Yes, this industry has given me a lifetime of memories. When I am an old lady, sitting in a rocker and smiling, no one will ever guess (or probably believe) why I am smiling and the stories I could tell.
As I post this, my final blog, I want to thank everyone who has been a part of my erotic journey with special thanks to...
- To Kwasi, who invited me to join this site to share my thoughts, I am grateful for this site and for the many Bloggers Parties he allowed me to attend.
- To Cathy at Room Service 2000, your friendship, support and guidance through the years has meant a great deal to me. Your efforts on behalf of the provider community helps keep us safe. If you are in Chicago, or touring Chicago, the best advertising and screening site is:
Http://www.roomservice2000.com
- To Sojourner who helped me when I needed it, your friendship meant a lot.
- To SWOP Chicago, a grass roots organization, comprised of volunteers who provide valuable information and links to resources, for everything it does for our community. If you can help SWOP by volunteering your time, making a contribution or just attending one of its many functions to show support, I encourage you to do so. Their website address is:
http://redlightchicago.wordpress.com/
Be safe everyone and enjoy your erotic adventures.
I remain...
Sinfully Sinthia
 
The Many Faces of Prejudice....
Some ramblings... Stirred by recent posts dealing with prejudice and racism.
PREJUDICE.
Prejudice comes in all forms. Everyone one knows of racial prejudice. People who do not like or trust people of other colors or nationalities. Prejudice, however, is not limited to race and rears its ugly head everywhere.
Sexual Preference
* According to the FBI, hate crimes against gays are on the rise. According to the Vancouver Sun, hate crimes motivated by sexual orientation doubled in 2008 from the previous year.
*42% of homeless youth identify as gay, lesbian or bisexual.
*Gay or lesbian students are five times more likely to miss school because of feeling unsafe.
*Lesbian, gay and bisexual youth are at four times the risk of committing suicide than others.
* A survey of 191 employers revealed that; 18 % would fire, 27% would refuse to hire and 26% would refuse to promote someone perceived to be gay, lesbian or bisexual. Also, due to sexual discrimination, lesbians earn about 14% less than their heterosexual peers.
Gender Identification
Transgender violence has also been on the rise and it is estimated that 50% of crimes against transgender individuals is not reported.
* Reports of physical abuse by law enforcement for transgender rose from 10 reported cases is 2007 to 25 in 2008.
* Sexual assault against transgender rose 48% and bias violence from strangers rose 36%.
Religion and Anti-Semitism
Wars are often fought over religious beliefs. After 9/11 hate crimes against people of Muslim or Middle Eastern decent rose in the United States and were up 1700% in the year following 9/11 as reported by the Human Rights Watch Organization.
Of hate crimes targeting religion, 85% were aimed against Jews. In New York in 2009, 37% of hate crimes were against Jews.
Part of the Problem or Part of The Solution?
We, as people, are either a part of the problem or part of the solution. When we fail to see someone for who they are, inside as a human being, and look only to their exterior; color, race or sexual preference, we are guilty of descrimination. When we make comments about stereotypes, we are part of the problem. When we feel fail to realize that we are all people, trying to build a life for ourselves and our families, we are part of the problem. When we manipulate figures to cast dispersions on people who are different, we are part of the problem. For example read the following statements:
"According to some statistics, and they vary, blacks are seven times more likely to commit violence than other races. Hispanics commit violent crimes at 3 times the rate of whites. Blacks are 7 times more likely to be in prison than whites and hispanics are 3 times more likely."
Do we then extrapolate that blacks and hispanics are bad? Or do we realize that geographical, socio economic, cultural and educational issues must be considered. A person residing in a slum, surrounded by gangs, prejudice and lack of opportunities may see crime as their only option. If this person had grown up in middle class America, with opportunites, would they have become criminals?
Other Causes of Prejudism
Prejudice can also be a sign of low self esteem in the sense that someone may make fun of another person because they are less attractive, look funny or are different in an attempt to set themselves above that person. To be better than that person. "She is fat." "He is short and has bad teeth." "She is a transexual with funny eyebrows. "
Prejudice can also be caused by jealousy. "Blacks are lazy and are all on welfare and get food stamps while I work and struggle to support my family." "The damn Jews have all the money while I struggle to make ends meet. " "That transexual is prettier than me."
Prejudice is also caused by ignorance or fear "I don't like gays as they may hit on me and I am heterosexual.". Or from religious bias, "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve," or "If God wanted him to be a woman, he would have made him that way."
When we make prejudicial comments, in a way, we are telling others that it is okay to do so. When we do not speak up when others make comments we are telling them that this is acceptable to us.
When we quit comparing ourselves with others, take accountability for our lives and accept ourselves for who we are, we are able to overcome motives for discrimination which deal with our own ego. Prejudice is not limited to any specific group, i.e. "whites.". People who fall into minorities can also be guilty of prejudice against other nationalities and people of other sexual orientation.
As a military brat, I grew up on base. I was not exposed to prejudice until I returned stateside after my father retired. If I didn't like a black, hispanic or white person in my class, it was only because of the way they treated me. Their heritage or color was not taken into consideration.
Effect Change Staring With Yourself
As providers we deal with prejudice on a daily basis from people who see us as somehow less-human than the rest of society. We keep secrets from friends, family and acquaintances because of fear of their reaction or reprisal. We are somebody's daughter, mother, sister, friend or wife. We know prejudice and its effects on our lives and the lives of others in this industry.
Let's rise above prejudice in our own lives. Let us be a voice of change of our hostile and fearful society with courageous acts of respect and kindness to people of different cultures and sexual orientation.
Website: http:/worldwithouthate.org
Earthquake and Tsunami in Japan
As some of you know, I am of mixed heritage. Half French and half Japanese, having been born in Tokyo.
Yesterday, near the coast of Honshu, an earthquake of 8.9 magnitude was experienced. It was followed by another Earthquake of 6.3 magnitude followed with another one an hour after of 6.2.
These earthquakes were so intense that they shifted the Earth on its axis. The result of which will be (a barely perceptible) shorter day.
The massive 8.9 earthquake caused a major Tsunami which resulted in the loss of thousands of lives and reports of up 10,000 or more missing.
The Tsunami also caused an exploson at the Fukushima atomic plant and resulted in loss of power (including backup power) to the plant. Japan is desperately trying to keep the rods cool by pumping sea water into the plant to prevent a meltdown. Iodine tablets are being distributed to the population closest to the plant to counter act the results of radiation and an area of 12 miles surrounding the plant has been evacuated. Hours ago they announced that a second reactor in the same facility is now at risk for meltdown as well. After all is said and done, these plants (even if meltdown is prevented) will be unusable and power shortages will result.
In areas in the disaster zone, and even in Tokyo, there are shortages of food, gas and supplies.
I have sent an email to my cousin, Hiroyuki, and am anxiously waiting for news that he and his wife and two children are safe.
Please find it in your hearts to donate to any of the relief agencies providing assistance to Japan.
* Apple I-Tunes has made it easy to donate to the Red Cross through their site.
or..
* http://www.redcross.org
* http:// www.mercycorps.org/donate/Japan
* http://www.savethechildren.org.au
* http://www.medicalteams.org
* http://worldvision.ca/give-a-gift/pages/Pacific-Tsunami.aspx
* http://www.msf/msf/donations/donations_home.cfm
Thank you!!!
Goodbye Missy
When it is time to say goodbye to a 4 legged friend.
I have a dear lady friend who has had a difficult few months.
First her marriage fell apart after her husband lost it and went aftr her physically leaving her no choice other than to leave the apartment that she lived in for 8+ years. It amazes me that, even though she got an Order of Protection, yet the apartment complex could not remove him from the lease or ban him from the property. Instead, she would have to sign a new lease, at a new rate, only after getting his release on the existing contract. Since staying was not an option, she chose to evacuate the apartment under the terms of the Illinois Safe Homes Acts which provides her safety from any penalties.
After finding an apartment, she moved in and took a deep breath as this was the first time she has truly lived alone. Alone, except for her loving cat, a beautiful Russian Gray, named Missy.
Missy who loved her unconditionally was a mature cat, about ten years old. She belonged to a male neighbor who had her as a kitty. Whenever she visited her neighbor, Missy always came up and sat on her lap and purred. So, when Missy was about 3, the neighbor began dating a woman who was allergic to cats. As such, he wanted to give her away, and Missy came to live with my friend as her constant companion.
Missy was a tiny cat, the runt of the litter, only about seven pounds and fine boned. She was very gentle, loving and delicate (in more ways than one).
After a year or two, Missy began to rub off her whiskers on the carpet. It was odd behavior, but the vet said not to worry. She looked somewhat comical, as a whiskerless cat, but she was still beautiful. Then a while later the itching began. She would scratch herself raw at times with her claws and draw blood. The vet put her on steroids for a few weeks. This helped a little, but the itching came back immediately after the steroids had left her system. So there were allergy tests. Missy had many allergies< both environmental and food related. More steroids, changes in food (no yams, no wheat), antibiotics, salves and bathing. Nothing helped.
Then the vomiting began. Small amounts with trace amounts of blood. A visit to the vet and an exam. He could find no reason for the vomiting. At least it was not cancer he tells her. Perhaps she ate something that did not agree with her. He prescribed some antibiotics and half a Pepcid daily.
At this point my friend and Missy move to their new place. Missy continues to scratch and vomit occasionally. The two are adjusting to their new home and the promise of a new beginning. Missy discovers the top of the radiator snd claims it as her private space. My friend puts a thick pad there so Missy will be more comfortable on her lofty perch, above our heads when we sit. Missy also likes the dining room (which was formerly a porch) during the day when the sun as she stretches out basking in her sunbeam.
Christmas is bittersweet. It is filled with both filled with hope for a brighter tomorrow and concern about Missy who does not seem to be improving, but not doing any worse and vomiting a small amount almost every day. However, every few days, Missy claims a new piece of furniture or place as her perch; the top of a speaker, in a computer stand, the window sill when the window is open as she makes the new place her home.
After the New Year, Missy's vomiting gets worse. My friend calls the vet who puts Missy on a low dose of steroid. It seems to help a bit. The vet want to see her in five days if there is no improvement.
Five days later, despite the steroids, Missy is getting worse. She now vomits several times daily. She no longer jumps on her favorite perch on the radiator. My friend brings Missy to the vet who examines her again and says that Missy has a large cancerous abdominal mass. He doubles to steroid dose to slow the progress, but Missy is dying. He does say that there is a slim chance that the steroids may cure missy (a statement I am sure he made to comfort my friend), but he also explained that he felt nothing on his prior exam and that this was a fast growing aggressive cancer an was over three inches long.
The steroids appear to help. Missy's appetite returns, her energy level is better. She no longer jumps on the counter or any of her high perches. (We later find out that her muscles had deteriorated significantly and she was no longer able to). However, she is affection, loving and seems to be improving. Perhaps she is beating this thing?
A week later, on a night that I stayed at my friend's overnight for a girls night, of movies, wine and celebrating the fact that Missy was holding her own on the steroids, we woke up to find that Missy had thrown up everything she had eaten the prior day. She had not digested anything.
A call to the vet resulted in the message that it was time. He said the tumor had grown to the point that she could no longer hold down or digest food. Time to let this beautiful creature exit in peace, free from suffering, free from pain, free to pass on.
The local animal welfare organization agreed to take Missy that day. Knowing that she had to be put to rest, it would have been hard to wait a day or two so we were thankful that they were so accomodating. It was all my friend could do to maintain her resolve to go through with it.
We went together. (I have had to put two pets to sleep in the past and this is not something anyone should have to do alone). Missy's Auntie Sinthia drove the car while her mommy held her in her lap. On the ride, Missy perked up, more alert and energetic, than she had been for weeks. She enjoyed looking out the window as it was sunny. We had some extra time so we drove around a bit before her appointment and letting my friend have every last minute available before we had to be there.
The vet allowed us both to go in. The vet could see that Missy's energy boost had given my friend some last minute false hope, she explained that often animals (especially cats) get a temporary adrenaline rush in the car and that it only lasts a short while. With that, Missy was given a small dose of anesthetic to put her to sleep. It was difficult to find muscle to inject it into, so they had to put the needle into her spine. Once she was asleep, she said her goodbyes and I also gave her a pet and a kiss. The vet then injected a massive amount of the anesthesia into her vein and her heart stopped. This beautiful creature had moved on.
I'd like to imagine her in the "kitty afterlife" lying on her own radiator, or sitting in a sunbeam or playing with a mouse. She is completely healthy. She no longer itches, vomits and can jump again.
My friend did the right thing. When we got back to her place, we cleaned all of Missy's things out of her home so she would not have to see them. She spent a couple of days at my place mourning her dear friend and companion. Then when she was ready to go home, I spent one night at her place. Tonight she will spend the night alone in her apartment without Missy.
There are people who cannot understand how difficult losing a pet can be. These four legged creatures give us unconditional love. They rely on us and we grow to rely on them. They are our companions, our confidants who we can tell our troubles to, our security blankets when we hold them close and they bring a smile to our faces after a long day when they greet us. They have their own individual likes, dislikes, behaviors and quirks and we love them the more for it.
My friend says she never wants another cat, because eventually it will die. I hope she changes her mind. With all the unwanted animals in the world, if she does decide to adopt one, it will be a very lucky animal. Until then, she is Auntie to my precious cat who loves her.
So, Missy, I miss you beautiful girl. Thanks for letting me know you.
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