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Well I am thinking about going back to providing 1 week a month......
but still a bit unsure. I am just a little hesitant because of all that psycho-*itch put me through for the last year or so. She really went way out of her way to try to ruin my life. She even went as far as trying to get my kids taken away from me by child services. Fortunately, I am first and foremost a VERY good mother and I was also able to file a report against her for making false accusations about me. Anyway, my point is, I am trying hard to get over the paranoia and fear that still lingers sometimes. It's a frightening thing to be stalked by someone, especially knowing the stalker hates you so much. I really really miss providing though and hopefully soon I will get over my fears and be back to my favorite past-time. Hope everyone had an awesome Christmas and has a great New Years as well.
**Jordan**
Twas the adult night before Christmas........
'Twas the night before Christmas, and boy was it neat.
The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat.
The doors were all bolted, the phone off the hook,
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy and I in the nude,
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the lube.
When out on the lawn there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner, and momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of the sled,
A sock in his ear and a bra on his head.
Sure as I'm speaking, he was high as a kite,
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa Shithead, whoa Asshole, whoa Stupid, whoa Putz,
Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.
Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.
And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each little reindeer now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Santa came with a crash.
His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He looked like a bum and smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay awhile"
He walked to the kitchen for himself poured a drink,
Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee,
The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.
Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.
The first thing he found was a pair of false tits,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.
A box filled with condoms was Santa's next find,
And six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several more things I shouldn't even mention.
A fuck ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
And a dildo so long that it lay in a coil.
"This stuff ain't for kids, Mrs. Santa will shit,
So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."
He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug stuck under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.
In time he was seated, took reigns of his hitch,
Saying,"Take me home, Rudolph. This night's been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout,
"The best thing about pussy is you can't wear it out !!"
~ M E R R Y ~
~ C H R I S T M A S ~
Happy Holidays!!
I love Christmas! I have kids and it's so awesome to see how they get so excited and wound up as the big day gets closer and closer. I am pretty much of a homebody lately, so it doesn't take much to get me excited lately. I love shopping and wrapping gifts and cooking a big holiday feast for all my relatives. We won't be having too many at Christmas because they all came last month for Thanksgiving but my oldest daughter is coming with her husband and kids and we have a pretty good size group here at home so it will still be a houseful. It seems like I am always the one chosen to do the cooking though, not that I mind. I remember being a kid and watching my grandmother cook all the food at the holidays and I guess I must have really been paying attention because now I try to do it just like she did. I've been trying lately to get the younger ones to start helping more in hopes that they will soon take it over but they really aren't all that interested. Anyway, I was just kind of bored and thought I'd wish everyone a Merry Christmas. I have a wonderful adult version of "Twas the Night before Christmas" that I'm going to post as well. Hope you all enjoy the season!
I feel so good today,
Like I've just unloaded a huge weight I had been carrying around my neck for far too long now. Theres a whole lot more to this then I am willing to talk on here about but lets just say that it's been an emotional roller coaster of a year for me and I finally feel the coaster coming to a stop, so I still have a few butterflies in my stomach but that will pass too. Most of my problems seem to stem from one person who found out about me doing this and systematically attempted to screw up my entire life in every way she possibly could, fortunately she made some very wrong assumptions about me and who I am as a person and failed miserably at what she was trying to do. Add to that my sister passing away and I was really feeling down about life for a while. Anyway, its all irrelevant now and I have chosen to let it all go and move on with my life instead of stooping to her level and trying to get revenge. I am the better person and I believe that karma will be back around to visit her without me ever having to waste my time or energy on it, I've got much better things to do. I feel so good and so happy. I absolutely hate to be manipulated and thats pretty much how I felt, like I was supposed to act and think and feel one way when it was not who I really am. I tried to conform to societies standards until I was absolutely miserable, now I am living for me, free to be exactly who I am and who I want to be, and I am just wiser for having gone through that and it taught me even more ways to be discrete, so if you ever get a chance to meet me and I seem a little cautious at first, its only because I was put through the wringer by someone who was trying to act like they were so much better then I am, when all along they were wrong and really had no clue about the kind of person I am. It feels really good to finally move on from it, even though I had to move, and change a lot of things in my life in order to finally make her stop, to me it was sooooooo worth it, just to be where I am today and feel how I feel, free to be me and happy and comfortable being exactly who I am.
Website: http://www.jordan4funn.com
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