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My Improper Compulsions

The longings have returned again,the fantasies.For awhile I thought that perhaps
they had gone for good, (and were somewhat relieved) but they are returning. Slowly, like a waking beast I have

felt the desires begin to form and build, ebbing and flowing.A week now and I have formed several small obsessive

crushes issuing fantasies that are without limit. I get caught up in them, staring into space. My devious thoughts

cause me to grin and it is hard to hide it from those around me. I seek the comfort of my own company, where I can

be alone with my thoughts .
The fantasies usually start when my psychic sense picks up pheremonal changes in others around me. Many people

form crushes on me, a side effect of such beauty. I pick up on them and reciprocate with one person or another who

appeals to me for whatever reason. A smile, an ocular connection that sparked or just anything at all. Male or

female, rich or poor, cute or ugly, young or old.
Scenarios begin to unfold in my head, play themselves out again and again and feed me, give me sustenance.

Because the person I fantasice about it is already attracted to me naturally, it makes the game better, sending

electric shocks of pleasure to me when I see them in a normal setting and his eyes linger on mine a half a second

longer, or her hand brushes the crumbs from my shirtfront a little too longly.I can feel the energy and it drives

me wild, I can read their thoughts and my clairvoyant mind vibrates with frenzy. These miniscule moments of shared

intimacy are enough to trigger off a whole new set of fantasies and scenarios to peruse and think about over

absinthe in the dark, looking out at the night sky silently. They're forbidden, they will never ever come

true,musnt, so why does that mean I cannot fantasize of them anyway, rapture in them, receive secret hidden

thrills? . These little delusions give me pleasure othes could not feel or even revel in? I a lucky to feel them ,

it would be a sin to deny myself the addictive raptures I tell myself. I sigh . So it begins again. I am victim to

my mind and its desires and the ons it triggers in my responsive human body.

I can see the same ache in him, the same need. He is the same,has the same weaknesses as me. We smoke and

exchange glances because it is all we can do.I wonder what he would look like in candlelight and immediately make a

note to visualise that later. We exchange another glance and laugh, because it is all we can do. Everything else is

forbidden. But the look is in his eye ,and the look was in mine.


You've been all over, and it's be all over you.Experienced,cultured.Wordly and wise , you're a fully mature

woman in all facets and dimensions and amazingly appealing to people of all ages and races. Especially in

sexuality.And very beautiful, catching every man and womans eye on the street, the latter sneering. What is wrong

with you that you have such bizarre and improper cravings ? What would you want with another woman or a stranger or

an 18 year old foreign pedicure boy ?And worse things. How can you desire these things? How can you spend a day

visualising such indecencies and not notice the rising or setting of the sun ? How the pleasure... why ??? I

don't know.... and so I hide it, and so the fantasies are enough , they have to be . This is what I tell myself.

When the fantasies come, this is always what I tell myself!

__________

I'm cutting potatoes in another womans kitchen, a woman I love. I am making food for her and her lover. The

idea of filling them with the delicious food I cook is pleasing to me, I'd like to think I give them energy for

their lovemaking. I am responsible for the energy in their bodies then, and that energy now includes me, and

promotes good energy into their marriage.
SO I cook, pouring myself into the preparations;the chopping of fragrant fresh parsley,the carmelising of salted

cream butter. Food is so erotic and so in tune with what I am doing I do not notice when the knife threads itself

into the sensitive tip of my index finger.
Eyes blurry with concentration and focus, I blinked back into present when I saw crimson colouring the knife .

The familiar sting of pain that is so close to pleasure I sometimes confuse them is now in my finger and I draw it

into my mouth by instinct and begin licking the blood away while applying the warm wet soothing pressure of my

tongue to the wound. The blood in my mouth ignites me, yet throws me into a lulling tonic through which a faint

throbbing is coming through. I am lost to the potatoes now , like a shark, the blood has put me into a different

state. I wash the blood from the blade and refriderate the potatoes, fine but for a drop or two of my blood. I

decide to leave it, consider it an offering. My eyes are conjuring an image to life before me in the kitchen.

_______________

There is a white faux fur rug on the floor before a roaring fireplace. On the imported rock mantle are

ancient stones and carvings and white candles flaming, and wax is pooling at their base. A table alit with a

ambiant rock luz and several other objects are conveniently placed to the left of the fire .I can even see the

furniture that has been pushed out of the way to make room for this romatic setting, it is of expensive and plush

nature,scarlets and magentas.
He steps shyly onto the rug, the way I imagined he would do. Bashful, laughing,tow headed. The look in his eye

is there though and my heart quickens. I take a step forward so the fire illuminates me beyong the diaphanous glow

of my long white gown. I love white, so virginal , so pure, so waiting to be spoiled. He can see me now and wasting

no time I remove the gown and let it slip off my silky oiled skin and pool at my feet. Just as the wax from the

candles. I arch my shoulders back and it naturally thrusts my already large breasts more forward and he is nervous,

excited.I am also anxious , knowing he has never seen a woman naked. Another step forward and I have hooked my

hand into the front of his pants and have him in my grasp, can feel the longly specualted about hardness just

beneath. It is of admirable length. I wonder if I can compare to a twenty year old girl and realise I am better, in

his eyes anyway. Clairvoyance is a wonderful gift.
His lips near mine, I can feel the heat emanating from them. I resist an urge to reach out and lick the salt

taste of him from them. then his lips . My hand has found solid purchase within his pants I am summoned from this

erotic hallucination just as my hands recognise the surprise of his girth. I am conjured back to reality by the

questioning voice of the woman, one of my mesdames, the one for whom I cook. She wonders why I am standing holding

a bloody knife, sucking my finger and staring off into the hills that are southern california. I am ill I say, but

as we speak I am improving.

Website: http://www.clips4sale.com/31122


Blog posted 09/01/2010 @ 08:55 pm  |  Leave a Comment



Whats going on?

Can I tell you whats going on? Can i discern myself whats been going on? I will try. I am in OC, wearing desinger shades that cover my face. (Walking round thinking you cooler than me )
I've got long cat like white tipped nails and my toes and spirit are the same, pretty, but dont be gouged.
I will visit Chicago in the beginning of october, before the Northern wind rips the tender flesh from my bones, and what pink smooth flesh it is.
I've retained my lakehouse and somehow acquired excellent SoCal housing. Karma is paying off. My throat chakra is humming, letting me know my raw psychic powers are tapped into the system and that I can hone them, sharpen them crudely like a flint knapper.
I have so much to say to you, but life is so abundant with me, my eyes dread the screen right now!
Live, Love,Laugh! Nothing more, nothing less.

Website: http://www.Generosa-Goodhand.com


Blog posted 08/27/2010 @ 08:54 pm  |  5 Comments  |  Leave a Comment



My Kind Of Lover

I discovered a new love today , a relevant and immediate love , that I am sure I have known in a past life.

Absinthe. Not the crappy American knockoff, but the heady, strong Spanish kind. The taste of the wormwood wraps

itself around my tongue in spirals and as I swallow it I feel a near religious reverance, my breath immediately

deepening and my eyes opening and seeing. My second thimble full I declined the melted sugarcube and mixed just

enough water to turn the amber water milky and sat back pleased and watched it swirl, already enlightened and

excited from the heady drink. I take pleasure in drinking it the way i take pleasure in my own body of recent, and

I salivate and tingle as I sip it slowly and feel it burn down into me.It meets with the warmth between my thighs.

I sit in the backyard and let the clamour of the city vibrate around me softly, the immenisty of the ocean

surrounding me. Thanks tot he absinthe, I feel older and euphoric. I see through the wood fence a neighbor has

movedm in next door and sensing my eyes on his Bronzed Mediterranean skin he turned smiling and with hand extended

walked to the fence and thrust it through at me. After I told him I was not Mrs Pizzanelli, he seemed immensely

relieved and joined me at the pool without asking. I prefered that, sometimes I like it when a man doesn't talk.

There wasa hum between us, a hum as strong as the pulsating hum of the city and I wondered if I could take such

selfish pleasure with a neighbour. The thought of random lovemaking with a random someone has always enthralled

me.He asked me once quizically after my soft lies, you are sure you are not little girl? I smile reach out and

squeeze his thigh, caught in the moment, my heart in my throat. Once glance into his hazel eyes let me know he felt

the same and soon we were naked on the ground protected behind heavy wood fence, me entwined with this dark man who

would make me scream with pleasure as the city throbbed around us and the palm trees swayed in the constant salt

sea breeze that is southern california.......
His skin would be sumptuous softness pressed agaisnt me, him afraid to unrobe ...So I did it for him. It must

of been his age, or mine. Button by button sleeve by sleeve I unveiled his amber skin and pressed my lips to his

skin, breathing in his scent. I reached my soft delicate hand down to his sex, noticing no signs of virility in him

but his sex and took it in my inquisitive palm and felt it all around, felt it stiffen in my hands. He moaned and

arched jerked as I moved my curious fingers around and then he threw me back on the beachbed, rather roughly in

fact. I liked it. Nothign was rough about the way he touched me, though he ripped my clothes off with ferocity. He

was staring at my lips and draping his weight over me and his right hand began to rub my sex in a circular motion

at the nub on top until I felt myself grow wet and swell slightly and my nipples tingled and as if he heard them he

took one in his mouth and licked it, then began tugging on it with his mouth. I moaned with newfound pleasure as

the city outside and below echoed its busy sounds around us . He reached a hand lower and inserted an index finger

into my tight opening and I squirmed around it. Twisting it so his tip pointed upwar he began to slide it in and

out while pressing upwards. Something inside me spasmed and as he added a second finger back to my engorged nub in

a rhythmyic patter I screamed an buried my fingers in his flesh as pleasure rocketed through my entire being. It

lasted forever.Like the first bite of summers juicy strawberry.
When he pushed into me I felt something break and felt warmth run out onto my thigh. But nothing hurt, and I was

there with him, locked in love,orgasmining again and again. All we did was love. When he rolled onto his back

breathless, I was hungry for more and grabbed his large hand and put it over my moist pink mound.
Later I would stand naked in the tub as he gently sponged the blood frommy thighs and asked me if it hurt. I

said it did not. He asked how old I was . I lied and then put a hand in his silky hair. He was much older and thats

why I wanted him. I was a girl full of sexual longings. I pulled his head down towards my newly ravished sex and

closed my eyes in anticipation of his tongue ... ***



**ggs quote of the day *** I wish people werent as see through as saran wrap.


Website: http://www.ggsplayground.com


Blog posted 08/11/2010 @ 01:32 pm  |  3 Comments  |  Leave a Comment



Fool For The City

I was in Chicago the other day. I marvel at the ease of which I take off my country crocs and khakis and slip into the ornate silks and fine cotton the city has to offer, making sure to polish myself all over as well with jewels and Dior parfum. I can slide easily between worlds, now I am back at home standing knee deep in muddy lake water, throwing endless tennis balls to energetic dogs.My manicured hand picks rocks out of the sand by my toes, looks for indian beads. Just yesterday I was o Wacker drive leisurly dining and shopping. I am rather pleased about being a chamelion. I just decided.

I need to get to work and write blogs for my other site. I have also taken a professional job in the "corporate world" and will be in transit more.I have the job I always wanted, minus the extra years of expensive college. I've reached a summit; conquered the unconquerable. My desires revolve around one now, just as the sun and the moon.

Website: http://www.ggsplayground.com


Blog posted 07/29/2010 @ 05:01 pm  |  4 Comments  |  Leave a Comment



 




Generosa Goodhand

Chicago ,OC,CA CA
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